Let’s Talk Anxiety Attacks, Shall We?

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The first panic attack

My throat feels like it’s closing. I’m shaking. My heart is racing. Am I dying? The first time I had an anxiety attack, I was on a flight coming home from a meeting in Boston – a place that I have traumatic memories all tied to my estranged mother. I turned to the stranger next to me, who I had politely made small talk with earlier, to let him know I wasn’t feeling right.  I mean someone needed to know if I was going down, right? Then I landed and rushed to the ER where they concluded it was just an anxiety attack. Just? What the f was going on with me?

Months of tests, poking, and fertility meds caused me to bubble over. Our first round of infertility treatments had failed {I’ll be sharing more of that soon} and this was how my body was manifesting the stress.  I was spiraling and for every failure and delay, my attacks worsened even striking  in the middle of weddings, rushing EMTs to hotel rooms, attacks while driving – all of it is debilitating.

Keeping anxiety in check

If you are struggling with anxiety, I think it’s important to be introspective and analyze what is your trigger? When I feel out of control or I’m in a situation that makes me feel uncomfortable, I can feel it coming on like someone who feels the rain in their joints. It’s physical for me. Luckily, while pregnant and around my babies, I’m able to keep myself in check, but they still happen as recently as a few weeks ago.

I’ve tried a holistic route as far as treatment is concerned. Everything from breathing exercises, lavender, and pressure point techniques. But the only thing that has really helped me is a few drops of CBD oil. If you haven’t tried it, it helps relieve anxiety, stress, nausea and is like a literal chill pill. It’s definitely worth a try. The other thing I do is really consciously try not to put myself into situations that genuinely make me unhappy. Sounds hard right? But it’s not. If it doesn’t make you happy, don’t do it, don’t go to that stupid event, you . That’s helped tremendously.

What can you do to help?

Eddie is a damn saint. I am E X T R A everyday. But layering on anxiety attacks is not fun for either one of us. The best thing you can do if you are helping someone cope with an attack is to not say ‘relax’ {I f-ing hate when people say that – it makes me so annoyed!} and to not diminish the feelings they are feeling. Hug them. Breathe with them. Listen to them.

So why am I sharing this part of me with you? I think it’s very easy to look on social and create the narrative of what you think someone’s life is all about. The truth is that everyone has their shit and this is mine that I own. If you are going through this personally, I want you to know that you aren’t alone even though it can feel lonely.  If you have a friend, who’s going through this, I’m asking you share this with them in hopes that it can help – even for a moment.

I’m raising my hand, stepping into the light and being honest about it. How do you handle your anxiety?

Share with me in my comments

P

xo