TheEveryDayVogue
The Real Shit

Sh*t No One Wants To Admit About Being A Mom: The Twos
Photography by Brady Scot Photo | Gowns by Shop by Ella-Rue

2020 baby! New Year, New – kinda – Mom Woes. If you haven’t kept up with the Sh*t No One Wants to Admit Series – well here you go. Being a Mom is f-ing awesome, but there are so many parts of it that no one talks about and I don’t get it. The truth is with anything it can be beautiful and not beautiful at the same time and that’s okay! As the twins get older, I’ve learned more about myself, them and being parents to them that I have to share with you. Before you keep reading, you have to take your judgment and throw it out the window. This is a safe space, okay? Let’s go!

Sh*t No One Wants To Admit About Being A Mom

Sometimes You Won’t Like Them, But You Still Love Them

This doesn’t make you f-ed up. This makes you human. Ever have a friend you love so much, but they drive you crazy? Samesies x 3523095 with kids. I love them so much, but man oh man when they do this certain {fake cry, say NO, stomp their feet, etc} it makes me feel like I’m going to loose my damn mind and that’s cool. Walk away. Tap out! I’ve shared this before, but it’s worth repeating. It’s okay to tap out and walk away.

Sh*t No One Wants To Admit About Being A Mom: The Twos
Photography by Brady Scot Photo | Gowns by Shop by Ella-Rue
Sometimes You Won’t Like The Version Of You They Bring Out

Ever found yourself yell in a way that makes you stop and feel some remorse for your own parents? Ugh just writing this is making me cringe, but happens and it’s ugly and it’s true. I love how the twins bring out this mooshy, gushy, lovey Mama out of me. They’ve healed me from my own issues with my Mother. At the same time, when they get cray, sometimes I can get cray too and it’s not cute. When I’ve shared that I hate how I respond sometimes to the twins with my Dad, he always tells me to handle my own emotions with grace. That we are all human. We have good days and we have ugly ones, so that advice I will share with you.

Sh*t No One Wants To Admit About Being A Mom: The Twos
Photography by Brady Scot Photo | Gowns by Shop by Ella-Rue
Sometimes They Are Looney Tunes Crazy

If we’ve been friends for a while, we recently went to LA for about two weeks and it was a sh*tshow of epic proportions. I’m healing from my concussion, the kids have ear infections, one gets pneumonia. Literally so crazy you can’t make this up. Anytime kids get sick, the situation is bound to get a little hairy, but as adults, as parents, we often try to lead with logic. “What could be causing this outburst?” “Why is he so upset about his monkey that he’s holding in his hand?” “Why is he screaming bloody murder about the crayon?” – you get it. Sometimes we have to throw out logic, because it’s illogical. We just have to live in their moods and that’s okay.

Sh*t No One Wants To Admit About Being A Mom: The Twos
Photography by Brady Scot Photo | Gowns by Shop by Ella-Rue
Sometimes You MUST Walk Away

There was a night that I was sleeping with one of our son’s {again in LA} that he woke up screaming, kicking, crying, and I tried EVERY single trick in the book to get him to stop – but I couldn’t. I found myself getting furious and frustrated, so I quite literally said ‘Mama is going to take a moment’ and did exactly that. Sometimes this is the only way to preserve our sanity and to give us the opportunity to refresh, reset and try again a little harder.

I share these experiences with you, because there is solidarity in knowing you aren’t alone or crazy. What are your Mom secrets you can dish with me?

Till next time

xo

P

The Real Shit

Sh*t No One Tells You About Being a Mom
Venue The St James // Photography by Photography by Jessica B //

Being a Mom is really f-ing hard – breaking news I know. Here’s the thing: in my two short years as a Mama, I’m constantly evaluating and observing things about this ‘clan’ that feel like universal truths, but often times aren’t verbalized the way I think they should be. Hopefully by sharing them with you, it will make us all feel more connected to one another and maybe give each other a little break every so often? Alright here we go:

boy holding a ball

Sh*t No One Tells You About Being a Mom

Fake It Till You Make It Because Everyone Thinks They Suck

Earlier this week I sat down with my Dad and asked him to critically evaluate my parenting. How can I do better? He looked at me a little crazy and said why are you so damn hard on yourself? Literally every Mom I know thinks they are doing a shitty job often – I’m often the worst contender. I’m constantly seeking that *nod nod wink wink* from others that lets me know – ‘hey girl, you don’t suck as bad as you think’. Feels reminiscent of the reassurance I needed during my teenage years – funny how it comes full circle right? What’s up with that?

I know for some it’s the downside of social media, but for me it’s not that. So often we mentally beat the shit out of ourselves and its actually undeserved. We are either there too much, neglecting ourselves as a result or not there enough and yearning for more time – more hours in the day. Can’t we just have a few 30 hour days, please and thank you!

The best thing to do here? Just talk to one another. So simple right, but it’s not happening enough. Admitting these feelings to someone/someones you trust is a release and is completely cathartic. Sometimes we just need to feel a little less in a bubble.

tips about being a mom

ASK for F-ing HELP

You are NOT weak for asking for help! I feel like I have to repeat that one! Here’s the deal, as a Twin Mom I have no choice. I’m outnumbered and need the extra set of hands and will accept help all the time but whether you have one or five, we all do. I was talking with a big group of Moms, who verbalized how hesitant or ashamed they felt by just asking for an extra hand. Like WTF ladies! I understand not everyone lives close to their families. Not everyone has access to nannies or daycare, but we do have access to other resources in the form of one another. I will be the first one to admit that I seek the help from friends, my parents, trusted friends, Daycare teachers, Daycare Administrators…EVERYBODY.

There have been many weeks where I had so many family members, friends, etc here that were in my house, they were bumping into one another and frankly I don’t care. I mean that purely in the sense that I don’t feel badly. I need them either physically or mentally. As we all paint our own parenting path asking for help or guidance does not make you less then. It makes you better, smarter and I promise you – happier.

It’s Okay To Not Want to Mom – You Are Human

Have you ever woken up and just not wanted to Mom because you didn’t sleep, are hungover, your kids pissing you off, etc? Yeah me too and that just makes you human. You aren’t a monster, nor do you not love your children. It’s okay and totally normal. When I feel like this, I have to verbalize it to Eddie and give myself a moment. The truth is if you don’t listen to those signals you will not be operating at your best.

father and son

Judgey McJudgerson Mothers

You know that Mom at the playground that gave you the look when your kid was crying? That cringey ‘yikes lady’ face that she does with her eyes? Yeah, she’s judging the f-out of you and the truth is the worst offenders are by other women. I’ve said it before, but I’m going to empower you with this again. Please dear lord take on a no f-s giving attitude. Make them invisible I promise it helps.

You. Are.Doing.Your.Best. Period. We are all entitled to raise our kids how we want to so rather than judging another Mom for her kid melting down in Target, know that a) that will be you at some point and b) have you ever gone up and tried to help her by distracting the kid to help calm him/her down? I’ve done this a few times and had it done in return and oh my gosh nothing will restore your faith in humanity quite like that. Try it.

boy playing soccer

Don’t Wait To Get That Manicure/Hair Done/ Workout/Botox

You know what truly won’t make you better? If you neglect yourself. Why do we default to this? Do the thing that makes you feel “normal” and don’t prolong it. It’s not silly or fickle, it’s so important.

Mommy Time Out Is A Thing

I love my baby boos more than anything in this world, but when they push certain buttons sometimes I need 5 minutes to reset and jump back in. Sometimes this means just being quiet for a few seconds so that I don’t yell or so that I can approach Mom-ing better. I do it. You should do it. Not exactly sure why we don’t take the same cues and actions we dole out to our kids, but a few moments can make all the difference.

So that’s it {for now!}. Can you relate? Anything else I missed?

Till next time,

P

xo

PS If you haven’t already read these, you should catch up:

Family

Sh*t No One Tells You About Having a Toddler
Twins Kanye West Top and Joggers : Little Villains Clothing

Okay this is a purely judgement-free zone. Anything that will be said, read or written by me {with friends input} will not be held against anyone, deal? Let’s get down to business – there’s a lot of sh*t no one tells you about having a toddler. If you think having a baby is hard, a toddler will test your physical, emotional and mental psyche, so I figured it’s better to know 100% what you are walking into versus going in blindly, right? Once again I enlisted my Mom tribe to weigh in so no one is blindsided by your tot. Hold on to your hats my friends:

They Will Cry For No F-ing Reason

You know that drunk girl that gets all up in her feels when she’s had one too many? It’s irrational. It’s loud, it’s the ugly crying and screaming. In college, you could stick that drunk girl in an uber. When it’s your toddler, you have to deal with it. In those moments, we typically do one of two two things: we try hard to get them to use their words or point to what they need/want. If that doesn’t work, we may do a timeout because often times that helps reset them and get out of their.. stupor. Keyword: often.

Twins Kanye West Top and Joggers : Little Villains Clothing
Twins Kanye West Top and Joggers : Little Villains Clothing

You May Think Your Child is Dr. Jekyll + Mr. Hyde

Smiling one moment, full-blown meltdown the next. Their moods swing as quickly as the wind blows.. legit. There are times when they are legitimately laughing with you then will walk over and start wailing. You’ll ask yourself, did I miss something? No reason to try to rationalize in these moments and no your kid isn’t bipolar, just a toddler.

If you say F*ck, they will say F*ck

At this age, they are learning and developing so much which is awesome, except if you have a bad mouth like yours truly, you have a parrot {or two in my case}. You know that saying ‘kids are like sponges’ or ‘kids say the darndest things’ I used to roll my eyes at that, but I get it now. They are absorbing all the good, bad and less than that you put out there. PS I’m totally f-ed when it comes to the swearing thing… sorry daycare.

Persephone Maglaya is wearing a black hat and a polka dot dress

You Will Not Understand Fury Until…

Your kid will say ‘no’, hit, bite, kick, punch, slap you. Holy f-ing go to your zen place. Take deep breaths, your kid is not a monster and this is often their instincts when they get frustrated and don’t know how to express themselves. Eddie and I have a tap-out method, so whenever we have been pushed to the brink, we can tap out – no questions asked – to take a breather. Try it, it helps. Also CBD, wine, a quick vent text, etc.

Twins Kanye West Top and Joggers: Little Villains Clothing

They Can Love and Hate Something in 30 Seconds

You know what’s f-ing infuriating? When you give your kid something you know they love and they spit it out, then scream for it 30 seconds later. This will happen and just keep reminding them how much they loved it before and to try it again.

You Will Make a Vomit Goblet

Don’t know what I mean? Your kid will spontaneously puke and instinctively you will f-ing catch it like it’s nothing. Like you are wearing a damn baseball mit, you.will.catch.that.gross.shit. Fact.

Your Purse Will Look Like a 7/11

If you don’t have 3592835 snacks on you, you will learn the hard way. I’ve learned the hard way and it sucked. These very small humans eat way more than most adults I know and man, if they ask for a specific snack and you don’t have it? Yikes.

Sh*t No One Tells You About Having a Toddler by The EveryDayVogue

Twins Kanye West Top and Joggers : Little Villains Clothing

The Meltdown

It will happen, publicly, unexpectedly and your kid will act like they are semi {or mostly} possessed. This isn’t an isolated event, nor should you think anything terribly ill of your kid, it’s all kids it just – you know – varies in strength. Put your f-the-world blinders on and handle it. Don’t worry about what anyone thinks or who is looking because every parent should empathize or help you. I always jump in and help strangers whenever possible, because you will be them and you will want a helping hand too.

I won’t sit here an wax poetic about my twins – Laurent and Roman – because I know you feel the obsession is real, but I think what is often downplayed is that this period of growth and development is exhaustingly beautiful and tough and terrorizing then beautiful again. It’s okay to yell – I yell {helllo I’m human}. It is okay to breakdown. It’s all normal and we will all feel like we suck at times. Alright, all that to say this. Yes, having a toddler is really f-ing hard, but the moments of joy, where they show you unadulterated, expressions of love, the ‘I lob yous’, the snuggles – all of it is absolutely worth the moments of …other stuff. Those tender moments will help get you through these times and make it worth it.

Did I miss anything?

Till next time,

P

xo

Family

Sh*t No One Wants to Admit About Motherhood
On Me: Neon Lace Bodysuit // Black Cargo Joggers // Manolo Blahnik PVC Pump – Similar Here

I’m not going to BS you, I absolutely love being a Mom. I love the menial moments to experiencing the world through their eyes – I could go on and on BUT… there’s a lot of sides to motherhood that are less than cute and to be honest kinda sucky. I asked several of you to spill your guts to me anonymously so you know that you.are.not.alone.

Big disclaimer here – This doesn’t mean I don’t love my kids, nor does it mean you don’t love yours – I’m obsessed with them. Just like with anything – husband, job, friendships, etc there are parts that are – you know – not as beautiful. It’s okay to be honest, so here we go:

Motherhood Confessions

Motherhood Confessions

WTF Just Happened to My Boobs

Whether you breastfed, pumped – whatever you did, your boobs are really the true war heroes in this whole baby thing. They get smashed, pulled, ripped at and they will never ever look the same again. Let’s dive deeper shall we? I popped my f-ing implant out of place while pumping. That’s right, I was trying to feed the twins and at 2am found my implant under my clavicle. This isn’t normal or dangerous, but it did happen to me and now it needs to get fixed. So yeah – this kinda sucks. I miss you former boobs.

Boogers and Nose Contraptions

Even typing this I’m gagging. I will do A N Y T H I N G to not deal with this. I know it’s needed, but I can’t. That’s Eddie’s job and tbh I’ve even had my bff Nose Frieda my kid, because I just can’t. Give me anything else. NEXT!

The Trifecta: Mom Guilt, Postpartum + Social Media

This was overwhelming the number one confession that I received from my Mama friends that I feel like we cannot talk about this enough. Postpartum depression is suffocating on its own and then you layer on the added pressures of social media can make you feel completely isolated. Please please please speak up. You are not alone and will not be judged. It’s normal and it’s important to raise your hand and flag it to those who you love and who love you the most.

My Bod Feels Like National Geographic

You have the baby{babies} and you still look pregnant. You are eating right, moving and still have that pooch. I really really want to focus on the fact that we grew a f-ing human and your body will not be the same. It WILL be different, it will require a different diet, a new workout routine. This is the time to change things up because just like your life will never be the same post-baby, same thing holds true with your body. Be kind to yourself and give yourself the time you need. PS If you want me to share those not-so-iG friendly postpartum body shots, I have them and I will. You tell me.

Will I ever feel sexy again?

Feeling like you lost your mojo is totally normal. I’ve talked about postpartum sex here.The good news is you will get it – but it takes time. I think we need to stop thinking that what worked in the past, will be the same. Do you need to change your hair? Do you need a new style? Think long and hard about what will make you feel good – even for a moment and harness it.

How do I make myself feel sexy? I started investing a lot in workout clothes, because I live in them and I spend less on regular clothes. I feel good when I go to a class and like what outfit I’m wearing and then wear it the rest of the day. I found this small change made a big difference on how I feel daily. This also goes hand-in-hand with why making time for you is so important. Essentially you must rebuild and create new frameworks for yourself.

Will I ever be able to pee in peace again?

Lord my twins will l i t e r a l l y take their baby fingers and stick them under the door followed by ‘Mama! Mama!” Adorable right? But also, can’t I just f*cking pee and scroll on IG with no one bothering me? One day ladies, one day in the semi-distant future. Sometimes I announce I’m using the downstairs bathroom to Eddie as a signal like – please let me be and don’t let them know where I am.

I miss my alone time

The reality is your alone time is going to be a much smaller window at this point, but you must carve it out for yourself because no one is going to proactively give it to you. I tell Eddie my workout schedule in advance or alert him when I make plans with friends. That’s his signal – I need my time. This is where communication with your spouse/SO is so key. I also wake up an hour before anyone else, so I can binge watch the Kardashians in peace and eat my breakfast without someone trying to steal a bite. Making the time is your investment in you.

Sometimes I’m so so so lonely

It’s so important to say this. It’s possible to feel lonely even when you are never alone aka there’s a kid always hanging on you. You can feel like you are on an island, but it’s important to find your person – I don’t care if they are your bff, your go-to Mama friend or someone you’ve connected with on IG. Find her. Tell her. Text/message her. Sometimes we just need others to know that we need to vent and that’s okay 🙂

Remember when I could hold my pee? That was cool – Yeah… about that.

I had a c-section and if I am jumping in a class I still get that oh sh*t moment. I have many friends who sneeze and tinkle. It happens. Welcome to your new normal.

If I had a dollar for each time I said ‘Please don’t touch your penis’.

Boy Moms stand up. You joke that it’s an inherent thing, but really it is and you’ve got to strike a balance between not shaming them, but also teaching them that’s it’s no kosher to flash everyone with your peen. Yeah I went there.

I hate when my kid throws tantrums in public

Okay I’m going to level with you. My kids do this on the regular and I do not give a f. When my kids tantrums at home, I don’t feed it with attention, so I wouldn’t do that in public to shelter my own nonexistent embarrassment. Here’s why. We are all trying to teach our kids to be nice, polite, kind, respectable humans and we are trying our damn best. Everyone will have their moments and embarrassment is just not an emotion I’m willing to feel.

So now it’s your turn. What things about motherhood are you a little meh about?

Till next time,

P

xo

Fit Pregnancy

Sh*t No One Tells You After You've Had A Baby
On Me: Utility Jacket // Military Hued Bodysuit // Camo Spanx // Sorel Boots // On Twins: Leather Jacket // 7 for Mankind Jeans // Black Superstar Adidas

I have NO idea why, but everyone tells you all the crazies that happen while you are pregnant, but very few tell you about all the shit after you have a baby. What’s up with that? I asked some of my Mama friends to weigh in so I can blow the lid off of postpartum secrets and create a safe space for all Mamas past, present and future. Here we go!

*Warning Super Graphic So Men/Dad Please Stop Reading*

Postpartum Secrets

Diapers for all!

You and your baby{babies} already have so much in common! No matter how you deliver, you both will leave in super hot mesh, granny panties, because you will be bleeding. Not for a week. Not for two weeks. For like a long time. Some of my gals even said way over a month. You’ll be rockin’ those sexy britches for awhile with pads that are so thick they make me cringe just to think about – but totally a necessity.

No One Knows WTF They are Doing

Especially first time Moms. Even if you have help from your Mom, it’s normal to think you are doing something ‘wrong’ but spoiler alert – there is no wrong. There’s what’s good for you and your bebe. Ask questions, call the doc, ask nurses – there is no such thing as a dumb question because we are all amateurs.

Postpartum Secrets by Persephone Maglaya

Let’s Talk Boobs Shall We?

Some people can breastfeed. Some people can’t. Who f-ing cares. I was shocked I had milk come in but didn’t care either way, you know why? It’s either a choice or it just doesn’t work out for whatever reason – either way is cool. You should expect an enormous amount of pressure from lactation consultants and to be honest – other mothers. Listen, listen, to your instincts.

Here Comes the Milk Maiden

If you are breastfeeding or pumping, this is a full-time job. I pumped every 3 hours round the clock for 5 months and my body felt like I had ran a marathon every time. You will feel like a cow and tbh there will be moments where you don’t want to breastfeed or pump. It’s okay to stop. It’s okay to not want to. Listen to that body and know that what’s right for you, will be right for your baby.

It’s Okay to Hate Breastfeeding

Feeling no connection or just hate doing it? That’s Okay! This isn’t have any reflection on your Momstarpower {yup I made that up}. I didn’t breastfeed because I didn’t like it and logistically it was a lot. It’s also okay to love it! I know Moms who love that time with their kids and feel an extra special bond. Either way, just do what feels authentic.

Postpartum Secrets by The Everyday Vogue

Sometimes Milk Gets Stuck

When it does it f-ing is so excruciating especially if you have mastitis. You’ve got to do everything from warm showers to pushing it out to using cabbage to ease the pain. The works! I had no idea what was happening to me and never had heard of this so this was sucky when you are trying hard to feed your kid{s}.

Buh-bye Hair

This is one that I had no clue about. Those thick, beautiful locks started to break off all around my face. I had bangs a la 90s style that I never ever signed up for! Some of my friends have had huge chunks of hair loss and even bald patches. This is normal and it grows back – somehow – really fast. Sometimes this hair loss is immediate, other times it takes months – for me it was 10 months postpartum.Y

Sex Doesn’t Feel Sexy

I warned you we were going there. It is not going to be sexy for awhile. I had a C-section and it was still excruciating for weeks.. months! Keep trying, slowly, but surely you will resume your new normalcy. It’s going to feel a little like a train has hit you every single time.. down there. Maybe a stiff drink beforehand or try Woo – it helps. You need to be honest about it and tell your partner to be reallllly gentle.

Father with twin boys

Visiting Hours Are Not Open Ended

Yes you want to show off that beautiful baby, but people are germy and pushy and you are freaking exhausted. Say no! Or say yes, but for 30 minutes. Keep it comfortable for you, because honestly when you are running on no sleep, no showers, messy house, it’s just about surviving the next moment. I’m giving you permission to operate on a no f’s given method.

Bounce Back Body Commentary

Some people really need to physically put their foot in their mouths. I cannot stress enough how dumb people will be with their comments – old and young. It’s NEVER okay to comment on a woman’s body post pregnancy especially as it pertains to snapping back. Talked more about this here. When you are ready, you will focus on it. Again, when you are ready, so be kind to your body and don’t negate the fact that you grew a f-ing human.

Postpartum Secrets

The Unsolicited Advice

Usually this comes from people who have either experienced having a newborn over 30 years ago or newer Moms who consider themselves experts. It’s okay to tell people aka family and friends how you want something done, because it’s your baby. We were very specific about the twins down to how they were burped and even more anal about their schedule. You don’t need to explain yourself, just do you.

Post Postpartum Depression is Real

So many people closet these feelings and cope with them alone, feeling shame about their own emotions. Our hormones are going wild. Your feelings are real and normal, please please please tell someone and know you aren’t alone. I didn’t experience this, but close friends have been in very dark places for months. Tell your spouse, a friend, a doctor, anyone! Don’t deal with it alone as help exists. I cannot stress it enough.

Lastly, let’s try our best to reserve the Mama judgement of others. Everyone handles things differently and that’s okay! Be uplifting to other mothers, because we are all trying to figure this out one hour, one moment at a time.

Did I miss anything? What surprised you about postpartum?

P

xo

Family

Photography by Photography by Jessica B  / Hair by District Chic Hair Co

I have a love/anxiety driven relationship with the holidays. Obviously I’m not a Scrooge and love the season, but the truth is that this sh*t is expensive and by the end of it, I feel like I’m hemorrhaging money. Maybe you can relate? 


The past few years, Eddie and I wanted to stop the holiday gift bleeding to make sure we are shopping smarter and doing a few things to prep to save a little extra cash, so the holidays didn’t have to feel like we were going to financially burst!

Here are 3 money-saving hacks to make sure you are not busting your budget during the holidays:
Photography by Photography by Jessica B  / Hair by District Chic Hair Co
Sell your uglies aka purge like now.

You may remember me talking about how I sold $20k of unused stuff around my house in the past year- don’t know what I’m referencing? Read it here. Anyways, long story short you need to selling things like right now. Be efficient and block out 1-2 hours of posting on multiple sites at the same time! We just purged a ton of things to give away and posted any items with even a little value that have been going unused. It all has sold in 2 weeks. I don’t know how else to say this, but people want your ugly sh*t. We used Poshmark, Tradesy, Letgo + Facebook Marketplace. Just do it.

Photography by Photography by Jessica B  / Hair by District Chic Hair Co
Use those points to flip into cards.

Do you save up points on your card? Flip your credit card points into free money by turning them into gift cards {i.e. Amazon, Target, Nordstrom} and using them on loved ones. You won’t believe how far those points go when you convert them and we’ve gone many years where almost our whole list was paid for by our credit card points.

Secret Santa + Amazon Wish Lists

If you have even semi-large families, you will immediately benefit from this. The truth is as we get older, we need less, but what we want is v v v specific, so why make people guess? We have family Secret Santa where one person picks and shares who has who and a budget limit is put in place. Kids are not part of this by the way! Then by a specific date, each of us is expected to add things to our list and circulate it among the family, so the guessing if they will like the item is obsolete, but it’s also way more personal than getting random gift cards for everyone. Don’t know how to create your list? Read about it here.

So that’s it! We try our best to stay within our means and not go crazy and it works. What are your money hacks during the holidays? Tell me down below:

Till next time,

P

xo

The Real Shit

a blogger mom and her babies, learned blogging one year

Transformative is the only word that completely describes the past fifty-two weeks of writing, creating, conceiving, and producing for TheEverydayVogue – my other baby. To say that I am grateful for your attention, but myself, Eddie, Laurent, Roman and I thank you for giving us a piece of your time each week.

I’ve had the extraordinary opportunity to meet and befriend so many different content creators – each with their own points of view, unique aesthetic and catering to different audiences. I wanted to shine a light on some of these women who have influenced me and shaped me, so over the next few weeks I have invited Nicole Santa of NarrativeofNic {@narrativeofnic}, Ascia of I Am Ascia {@Iamascia}, Dani Sauter of Blonde In the District {@Blonde_InTheDistrict} and Elina of Elina from Sweden {@elinafromsweden} to share their tips to those looking to start creating content, taking on a new venture or exploring what it means to have a blog.

what i learned blogging one year
 Photography by Photography by Jessica B // Outfit by Alice + Olivia

Kicking it off, I wanted to share the advice I needed a year ago that’s applicable for starting a blog, an IG page or really any new social venture. Lastly, I thought I’d share how this journey has impacted me – here we go!

Take it Seriously – Three months before I started the blog, I was working on it. Designing the logo, standing up the website, getting my content schedule in order. What are my presets going to look like? What was my vibe? Do I need Lightroom? WTF is Lightroom? I read Blog-doo – a resource created by Lauryn Evarts- Bosstick of The Skinny Confidential and Erica Stoleman of Fashion Lush – both of whom I entrusted. I sought the help of Nicole Santa aka @narrativeofnic who I had followed for years {more on that soon!}.

Most importantly my words were important, but what the f was I going to say? Will I be using iPhone pics? Photographer? Ah! I threw out a date – August 15, 2018 to my friends and family to hold myself accountable that this sh*t was happening. When you launch a blog, an IG page – whatever it is – take it seriously. The moment you put a declaration out there, people are watching and judging {it’s fine but be aware}, so be mindful that you have a responsibility now. I implemented the structures of a business and let the content and visuals be the fun space for creativity to flow and I’d highly encourage the same for you.

expression through fashion blogging
 Photography by Photography by Jessica B // Outfit by Alice + Olivia

I don’t know what I don’t know – this is my constant motto. I’m constantly learning, leaning in {and on!} those who I trust the most. When I hit ‘publish’, it is at a minimum a week’s worth of writing, editing, shooting, and re-editing. Not to mention filtering, photo edits, and Eddie approvals (is that the right word usage?). I agonize because I feel like you can feel the soul in each word selected. This is regardless of whether I’m talking skincare or shedding layers of my heart in vulnerability. I approach it with the same level of effort whether we are talking skincare or talking about anxiety attacks. It is my hope you feel it.

what a woman learned blogging about fashion
 Photography by Photography by Jessica B // Outfit by Alice + Olivia

Challenge Yourself To Be Better Each Week – That’s a little 2 for 1. How can you improve each week and push yourself harder? Everyone is always talking about the saturation in the blogger/content creator space. I think that’s because so many look to their left and right. Look down and straight. What do I mean? How can you up your own game on stories? How can you improve your aesthetics visually? Can you be more concise in your captions or test out microblogging? What can you do that feels true to you, but allows you to expand creatively? In the next year you will see that I will be pushing even more into video. I found I really enjoyed it. I also will be finding other ways to enrich my blog, while remaining true to who I am. Can’t stress enough to stop comparing yourself, because there’s only one you.

babies and their mom about blogging after a year
 Photography by Photography by Jessica B // Outfit by Alice + Olivia

Focus On Your Tribe – Listen up for two main reasons. Please, dear lord, stop giving a damn about followers and likes and focus on keeping up with the people who want to hear from you. Who actually messages you back? Who is taking the time to comment below? Love on those people really hard and reply to the comments, be authentic – it always shows! Secondly, get a pulse check. I constantly run posts and edits by the people closest to me. This is to make sure that my content is resonating with my tribe. I found the more that I showed my heart, soul and vulnerability, the deeper my connection was with you. Listen and pay attention.

a family of bloggers
 Photography by Photography by Jessica B // Outfit by Alice + Olivia

Lastly – and this isn’t a tip but more looking inward – you know that saying ‘you didn’t know what you were missing until you had it?’ For me, I felt a void of creativity before I launched this space. I didn’t know how cathartic or fun writing would be for me, nor did I know how much I’d enjoy coming up with new content with my family every week. It has filled me to start conversations with you, to create a community with you or have you know that you and I are more similar than dissimilar.

Again from the bottom of my heart, I thank you and I cannot wait for what’s to come!

Till next time,

P

xo

Uncategorized

How I Made $20k in less than 6 Months Selling Sh*t on the blog

Did I get your attention? It’s not a joke. I’m a firm believer in “selling things to get the things you want.” I made over $20k in less than 6 months with some extra hustle and focus. I’m sharing my favorite selling apps and tricks I’ve used to make and save that extra dough below:

Twin boys wearing banana shirt, jeans and Adidas shoes

How I Made $20k in less than 6 Months

Sell ALL Your Uglies

Look in your closet and take that ugly sh*t out of your closet immediately. I’m not saying to forgo donating some of it, but anything with value, you need to sell. As Marie Kondo says, if it doesn’t give you joy, deuces ✌️. Can’t remember when you’ve worn it? Bye bye 👋. You’d be amazed by the things people will buy. One woman’s ‘trash’ truly is another’s treasure and I’m talking from your stuff, to your husbands, to that ugly piece of furniture that has somehow traveled with you from college that you hate. Purge yourself of all of it.

Father an son

Let’s Get Specific -Where to Sell

When it comes to selling clothes/accessories at all price points, I swear by Tradesy and Poshmark and I always post both at the same time – more exposure can never hurt, right? I paid for my ‘Chanel wallet on a chain’ with the money I made on these sites. Nearly all my shoes I buy from selling a ton of things and purchasing brand new or worn one time. For selling furniture, kids stuff, etc, Let Go and Facebook Marketplace are insanely effective. I’ve sold everything from workout equipment to couches to baby bounce chairs – you name it, I’ve moved it.

Time Block

Taking pictures, uploading photos, adding descriptions sucks. I’m not going to sugarcoat it, but I recommend – if you can – to have one person take the pictures and the other person can upload them to all the desired channels. I’ve even gone as far as hired a task rabbit just to hold me accountable and take the pictures for me so I don’t loose momentum. I block off 1-2 hours a month to do this and it pays off.

The Everyday Vogue is sharing: how I made $20k in less than 6 months

Sell Towards A Goal

Price things to sell as they are literally collecting dust just sitting there. $10 here, $15 there, really add up and it’s better out then taking up space. I like to sell with a goal in mind meaning I sell things to buy other things I really want/need. How are you going to get to that trip to Italy you’ve wanted? That pair of shoes you’ve been eyeing? You’ve got to purge to get what you want, so buckle down and make it happen.

I have other money saving tips and tricks, should I share them with you? What apps do you like to sell on?

Till next time-

P

xo

Family

Your Career Is Not Over Because You Are A Mom
On Me: Aaliyah Tee / Lace Bodysuit / Gray Skirt / White Boots // On Him: White V Neck/ Black Jeans / Jean Jacket / Gucci Shoes // On the Twins:Julian Striped Bodoke Romper / Vans // Photography by Jessica B

When I got pregnant, I thought this was the beginning of the end of my career. How could I do both? How could I make sure I didn’t suck as a Mom but also didn’t drop the ball from my work and clients? No this isn’t going to be one of those posts that says ‘work-life balance’, etc. etc. I’m sharing a few tips on how your heart can feel a little less torn between work and home and know that it’s possible to do both successfully. You can still have a career and be a kick-ass Mom.

Your Career Is Not Over Because You Are A Mom by The Everyday Vogue

Your Career Is Not Over Because You Are A Mom

Create Boundaries and Stick to Them

Before I became a Mom, I was at my clients beck-and-call 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. The truth is that was excessive and I created those expectations. It was up to me to retrain my clients expectations just as I had set them. My time with my kids is limited and precious. I rarely – unless it’s exceptionally urgent – will take a step away from them to answer an email. It can wait until after the kids go to bed or nap.

Utilize Efficiencies

Efficiencies come in all shapes and sizes. For me I use apps, pose questions to my Mom Tribe {aka a handful of go-to Mamas who I trust} and quite simply ask for help. This doesn’t make you incapable of juggling both, it actually makes you capable of handling and it’s a necessity.

A father is kissing his son.

It’s Okay That Work is a Priority

Things will ebb and flow right? There are times I have to travel and I hate being away from my babies, but I always tell them that I’m going away for a moment only to make our lives better. It sucks, it hurts and I will never downplay the gut wrenching feelings I have when I leave them, but I know they will understand one day.

Mom Time Vs Work Time

Let’s be honest, being a parent is a 24/7 job, but there are times where we can turn the volume down slightly aka when we are at work. This doesn’t make us bad parents, this makes us efficient parents and the key is to truly trust in your caretakers – whomever they may be – daycare/nanny/family. Be there for the most important moments and you won’t miss a thing.

Your Career Is Not Over Because You Are A Mom by The Everyday Vogue

It Takes a Village and That’s a Damn Good Thing

They say it takes a village, right? It’s because it does. We want our kids to not only be developing communication skills with us, but to be able to adapt and thrive among others around them. Eddie and I always talk about how amazing it is that the Twins have their own, special relationships outside of us that includes teachers, grandparents, etc. Whether you have a nanny or your kids go to daycare, socialization is important, so don’t fret.

Be In It To Win It

What do I mean? The truth is we cannot be in two places at once and if we focus too much on how torn our hearts are, it’s overwhelming. Please please please know that just because you are at work, doesn’t mean you love your kids any less or that they think their nanny is their new Mommy. Give 100% of your attention to work while at work and shift gears to be 100% on Mom time while at home. Yes there are exceptions, but if you shift your mentality, it will help you sleep better at night.

Persephone Maglaya's twins

I feel like I have to close with this – it’s okay to want to advance in your career. It’s okay to be a stay at home Mama and also it’s okay to work full-time. Your kids will know that you love them if you just make your time filled with love and quality.

How do you juggle the two?

If you like this “Your Career Is Not Over Because You Are A Mom” post, also, check out 5 Ways To Handle Mom Guilt, Sh*t No One Wants to Admit About Motherhood, and How to Wrangle Mom Guilt.

P

xo

Family

A Day In the Life of Quarantine
Photography by Sarah Heaton

A Day In the Life: Quarantine Style

A few weeks ago, I did an instagram live and this was one of the most asked about questions. What does our day look like during #quarantinemode and what are we doing to make it feel a little less awful. Let’s set the stage for a quick sec: twins.business.two full-time working parents. mental health. physical health. stress. SO MUCH. The truth is everyday is different, but here’s what it looks like in a ‘perfect’, quarantine world.

5am:

Gratitude journal and setting intentions for the day. I never ever ever thought I’d be that person, but look at me preaching this to you. It has made a huge difference in my perspective and looking inward at what you DO have that IS right is really helpful.

A Day In the Life of Quarantine
Photography by Sarah Heaton
5:15am – 7am:

I’m up working with my team {some of whom live in Greece!}

7am – 7:45am:

Wake the twins up and get them ready for the day, which includes making breakfast of course. I’ve been trying to shake things up for them first thing in the morning, by singing, dancing and making new REALLY easy recipes. If you want to know what I’m cooking, leave a comment down below.

8am – 8:50am:

Workout 1. This is not a negotiable.

9-9:30am:

Workout 2. Also not a negotiable. See what I’ve been doing here.

A Day In the Life of Quarantine
Photography by Sarah Heaton
10am – 12:30pm:

A conglomerate of let’s keep the boys doing random sh*t, which looks like walks, spanish class, music class, circuits {if you didn’t catch this on my story this totally works to tire them out}, painting, rice playing, anything to keep things moving. This is also my time to watch them and be working alongside. I struggled with this REALLY badly the first few weeks as I was trying to be physically and emotionally present at all time for both clients and my twins, which is completely impossible.

12:30pm – 1pm:

Lunch, which I’m making for everybody.

1pm – 2:30pm:

This is new. They used to sleep from 12:30- 2:30pm. No more! I don’t know wtf happened, but this has seized, so now we try round 2 of getting the twins exhausted. Walk, playing with legos, reading books, free play. Just anything to slow them the f down. Also during this time, I’m working and texting with clients constantly.

2:30/3-4:45pm:

There new nap time. Like wtf is this? This is also my time to catch up on the day. This is also the time where I create tiktoks – yes I make time for that daily. And this is when I answer emails, post, write, repeat. I will often take calls during this time, but what used to be calls stacked on top of one another {meaning a time block of conference calls} is no longer, because I found that too overwhelming.

4:45pm – 6:30pm:

This is generally Eddie’s shift with the boys though it switches. He’s so amazing and when he can stack meetings and give me a morning to catch up he always does.

6:00pm – 7:30pm:

Working while making dinner and eating dinner. When the f did I become Martha Stewart ? Cooking every damn day?

quarantine routine
Photography by Sarah Heaton
7:30pm – 8pm:

Family snuggle time in bed. I will admit this is one of my favorite times of the day. I will also admit that it does at times frustrate me that Eddie and I used to have an extra hour of quiet together as they used to go to sleep at 7. Le sigh.

8/8:30pm:

I almost always have a client call during this time. Clients have been very understanding about the limited time, so it goes down.

8:30pm – 11/11:30pm:

Working. Posting. Writing. Catching up on emails. Spending time with Eddie laughing about how we survived another day. What we can do better, etc. I will say I haven’t been watching much of anything. After the concussion, it was hard for me to multitask by watching shows and working, so I still have kept it limited.

Also, we’ve found that taking the boys to my parents house and giving him 1-2 days a week to realllllly get ahead of things is helpful. Then on the weekends and 1-2 a week, he does the reverse. He heavies up on managing the twins generally Friday and Saturday for sure and any time during the week. It’s chaotic, but we are making it work somehow.

Lastly, one thing I would strongly encourage you to do is find something to be excited about each week. If you’ve been following along on stories, you’ll know that we have been throwing mini parties for the twins, since they won’t have their big shindig this year. The first week was fun, but the second week they were SO excited. This week even more so than ever. Follow along on stories for more weekly details.

Be safe and till next time,

P

xo

Receipes

two women in the kitchen eating Low Carb Cheesecake

My kind of pie right? Holiday season is underway and that doesn’t mean you have to 1) skimp on desserts OR 2) eat food that will make you feel like sh*t later. In comes my girl Lauren Fit Foodie and I’m not even going to lie to you, I straight fan-girled having her over. If you don’t follow her, go fast now – @laurenfitfoodie – for the most delicious high protein and macro friendly meals that you will want to copy asap and one of my favorites is this low carb cheesecake. Lauren’s sharing her Thanksgiving inspired cinnamon cheesecake pie that has 90 calories for one slice! {I know… mind BLOWN!} Find the full recipe on Lauren Fit Foodie’s blog here.

High Protein, Low Carb Cheesecake, Without Any Guilt For The Holidays

Videography by Take The Damn Shot

Low-Fat Cinnamon Swirl Protein Cheesecake by Lauren Fit Foodie

So there you go, no need to skimp on those desserts but this season you can be completely guilt-free!

PS You will want this Pescience’s Snickerdoodle protein powder with code Laurenfitfoodie and save 15% off!

Till next time!

P

xo


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